Month: June 2010

There is a very funny conversation regarding Insurance . Do you get these kind of phone calls ?  Put your comments 🙂

Ten ways to terrorize a telemarketer (contribution from a reader “shib “)

1. When they ask “How are you today?” Tell them! “I’m so glad you asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died.”
2. If they say they’re John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.
3. Cry out in surprise, “Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?” Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where the hell she could know you from.
4. If ABC calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, “I don’t have any friends… would you be my friend?”
5. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.
6. Tell the telemarketer you are on “home arrest” and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips.
7. After the telemarketer gives their product info, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.
8. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their HOME number, you say “I guess you don’t want anyone bothering you at home, right?” The telemarketer will agree and you say, “Now you know how I feel!”
9. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. “Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how’s your momma?”
10. And first and foremost: Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.

How to Attack Back on telemarketers

Pramod Moudgill shares how he attacked back beautifully on telemarketers when he got a call 🙂

1. I got a call from CitiBank for Credit Card. I asked them to only talk if they are serious about giving me the card because many call but they do not provide the call so I am really frustrated. The lady said sir what is your income. I said 30k a month to which she replied sir no problem we will definitely issue you a card. Are you salaried or … I said I am business man. What kind of business, “Madam main delhi mein auto chalata hoon”. She immediately reacted sir aapka card nahin ban sakta. Now it was my turn and I started, Kyon ji auto mein kya problem hai maam apna auto hai, sari kishten utar chuki hain, maam main bahut honest aadmi hoon, meter se chalta hoon , jab ek 70k ke Bike wale ko card de dete ho to mere paasv to 2lakh ka auto hai. All the time she was trying to speak but I just continued then finally she said sir co. policy nahin hai & again it was me ..”to pehle kyon nahin bataya mere 2 passenger chale gaye, harjana kaun dega meral loss kaun bharega main auto union mein complaint karunga & blah blah blah… & my no. is now free from citibank calls.
2. I got a call from ICICI bank for personal loan. I asked what is the rate, she said 18% . I asked “madam mere paas 2 lakh hain aap mujh se 15% par le lo. ”
   She said “sir mujhe nahin chahiye” I said please aap holiday jao, LCD kharido & do what ever you want I am giving at only 15% come on.! Then again she said, “Sir maine bataya na mujhe nahin chahiye” Then I said” So who told you that I need one, jo aapne call kiya, aur aap log kya ek baar batane se maan jaate ho. Aap soch lo Iwill call you tomorrow.”

Comments 🙂 ?

There are a huge number of Indians who are working abroad or will go abroad one day and work there. Even you might go out of the country one day and become an NRI, so here’s a very short, to the point guide for NRI investments.

Today we discuss the most important NRI investment options and we’ll focus on four things – Basic Banking Accounts, Insurance, Mutual Funds, and Shares. That’s all.  The rules and information here are basic, but further study can be very detailed. Let’s quickly look at some important concepts every person should know. Even if you are not an NRI, you can at least advice your other friends 🙂 The first step every NRI should take, is to get the correct Banking accounts opened. Here are the options:

What is an NRE account?

NRE bank account is an external savings bank account opened for Non-resident Indians and hence called Non-Resident External account. Any money lying in the NRE account can be taken outside the country or in other words, the money lying in an NRE account is fully repatriable. This money can be converted into any foreign currency and can be remitted outside the country. For opening these accounts, the funds are required to be remitted to India through any bank from the country of residence of the prospective account holder. The accounts may be maintained in any form e.g. savings, current, recurring or fixed deposit account, etc. (How to find best Fixed Deposits in India)

What is an NRO account?

NRO bank account is an ordinary saving bank account opened for Non-resident Indians. This is why it is known as the Non-Resident Ordinary account. You open an NRO account when you want to transfer money from your overseas bank account to an Indian account in Indian Rupees. The money lying in the NRO account cannot be taken outside the country or in other words, the money lying in the NRO account isn’t repatriable. This is can be in form of Fixed Deposit accounts also (compare rates)

What is an FCNR account?

A FCNR account is a Fixed Deposit account with maturities of minimum 1 yr to maximum 5 yrs of tenure. FCNR stands for Foreign Currency Non-Resident (Bank) Account. The money in this account is always maintained in foreign currency, so it does not carry a currency risk (your $10,000 is always worth $10,000). The money lying in a FCNR account can be taken outside the country (or in other words, it is repatriable.)  Deposits in these accounts can be made by remitting funds from abroad.

Comparison of Table

Can NRI take Insurance?

Yes, NRIs can buy Insurance in India; however they have to be present in India, while taking the Insurance. They should, therefore, plan for buying the insurance when they are on a trip to India. One important point, is that the premiums should be paid from NRE account, if the maturity value is to be repatriable, else only the partial amount will be repatriable,(for which premiums were paid from NRE account.) One has to make sure, they have all the necessary documents in place before they come to buy insurance.

Documents are

• PAN Card
• Income Address proof
• Overseas Proof of Address
• Proof of Income  (Salary slip, Bank Statement or ITR for last 3 yrs)
• you will also have to fill a separate form called NRI Questionnaire-Annexure II

NRI investment in  Shares ?

Steps required by NRI’s to start trading in Stock Markets

1. Apply for a PAN card (you can do it online.) You will get it within a week.
2. Open an NRE/NRO account. You will require this account to fund money for your stock market transactions. Make sure you choose the account carefully, depending on your requirement (Repatriable/Non-Repatriable basis etc.)
3. Apply for a general approval for investment in Indian Stock Market through it’s designated bank branch, this is called PIS (Portfolio Investment Scheme) (PIS rules  in detail)
4. Once you have a PAN card, you’ll have to open a Demat account with any bank or a brokerage firm – you will require this for trading.
5. Finally, you need to have an online stock market trading account for investing in the stock market directly. Generally, you can get a combo Trading + Demat account at the same place.

Note that NRI’s are not allowed to do intra-day trading (can’t buy and sell on the same day)

NRI investment in Mutual Funds

NRIs can invest in all Indian mutual funds, except in funds promoted by Asset Management Companies based in the U.S. (Fidelity, Franklin Templeton and HSBC.) The payment can be made from any of the NRE/NRO/FCNR accounts. If they make payments from NRE/FCNR account, then it can be on a repatriable basis (They can take the profit and principal out of the country.) But, if they make payment from NRO account then it will be on non-repatriable basis. However, the dividends can be on repatriated. No prior or extra permission needs to be taken from RBI for this. This is allowed by default. There is no tax on dividend income, and long-term capital gains tax is zero in India when investing in Indian equity mutual funds.